Your Boundaries are For You

Boundary: a line that marks the limits of an area

Boundaries are crucial to living a healthy and whole existence. Sometimes, when we create boundaries we think that the boundary is to keep others at a distance. However, boundaries are a way of managing yourself, not others. The boundary is to keep you. Boundaries keep you from over committing, from trying to manage the feelings of other people, from saying yes when you want to say no. Boundaries are meant to protect you. Without healthy boundaries, you will have a hard time living a life that prioritizes your values.

When thinking about creating boundaries, you have to first decide on the purpose of the boundary. Some examples are: creating boundaries to keep you from over committing, to have more time for sleep, to increase your peace in the evenings, or to create a physically healthier life for yourself.

The boundary you create may look something like this:

Desire: I want to have more time for sleep.

Boundary: I will not answer phone calls after 10:00pm.

OR

Desire: I no longer want to over commit myself.

Boundary: When someone asks me to do something, I will let them know that I will get

back to them with my answer instead of answering in the moment.

OR

Desire: I will create a physically healthier life for myself.

Boundary: I will block off mornings, 9-11, on my calendar each weekday so that I can

exercise.

It is important that you create boundaries that serve you well, by aligning with your values. For example, if you value freedom, you may need to create boundaries that keep you from over committing. Well created boundaries will help you maintain the values that are most important to you.

With Gratitude,