You Are the Problem

You: used to refer to the person or people that the speaker is addressing

That impossible co-worker, that difficult child, that stubborn employee, that impossible spouse. We all encounter situations in our lives that feel difficult, sometimes even impossible maybe. When we find ourselves in those moments, it is extremely easy to blame the other. However, in all of these circumstances, you are the problem. Now, before you take offense, let me explain.

You are not causing problems (hopefully), you are not a terrible person, and you are not wanting there to be problems in any of your relationships. When conflict arrives in relationships, any type of relationship, they are almost always due to poor communication. When there is conflict, that may be due to you (or the other person) not asking the right questions or not hearing the right answers. The way in which someone says something, is just as important as the way in which the listener hears.

So, you may be the problem in the situation at hand because you are engaging in poor communication. Or, you may be the problem because you are not truly assessing the situation at hand. Here is the thing, in every situation and relationship you have options. Perhaps, the situation at hand is unsolvable and in that case, you need to walk away from the relationship.

Your truth is that you always have options. Because you have options you can choose how you show up in relationships, how you communicate, and which relationships you choose to engage in.

With Gratitude,